Invalid argument: You're not a woman

I love how often, when people say this, they say it as if they are bringing new information to the table. As if they have discovered something that no one else is aware of. As if they have just seen through my clever disguise, and point their accusatory index finger against and say "AHA! You're not a REAL woman"

Well I have never claimed to be a woman, and I've never really felt a need to claim to be a woman, because if something is true when a woman says it, it is true when a man says it. Truth is not related to the gender of the one who speaks it.

I'll some times feel emboldened to speak on moral issues that concern women. Such as for example abortion. If abortion is wrong, it doesn't become right because I'm a man and can't become pregnant. So it seems strange to bring that up in an abortion debate. It would be similar to saying that black people are disqualified from saying slavery is wrong because they didn't qualify to own slaves.

So what does she do for a living?

There were a number of questions I dreaded during my courtship with the wonderful young woman who is now my wife. One of them was "how did you meet?". With her being from the States and me from Norway, I guess that's an obvious question. But you can only explain that "we met through the internet, but it's not like that" so many times before you eventually just try to avoid the topic. On that note, we'll be posting a video on my wife's new blog where we share our story in the very near future.

Another question I dreaded was "what does she do for a living?". My answer, that she was staying at home working with her mom to learn the skills of homemaking, isn't exactly kosher in our feminist culture. And in most people's ears it largely synonymous with "nothing". Some, still looking for a good spin on the situation followed up by asking, "well, does she have an education?" When I explained that she didn't see education as a worthwhile pursuit for herself, their looks got even more puzzled. You see, in our culture women are valued in terms of careers and income. And in those terms, the wife I had chosen was worthless. Yet I knew that I had found a true treasure.

My wife has taken much heat for her stance against the subtle feminist attitudes that prevail throughout our culture. She has risen above the stigma of being a homemaker, and take great joy in adapting to her her new role as a wife, and hopefully soon a mother. If you ask her she will say that those are her highest calling. And I would add that it's the highest privilege for any husband and any child to be loved by a woman like that. It's worth so much more than the vacations, cars and other materialistic goods that we can't afford on a single income.

I've talked to several men who, though they're unwilling to depart with the extra income she provides, gets a certain look in their eyes at the thought of their wives staying home. Yes they discard it as completely unrealistic, but still they desire it. Several women too have disclosed to me that they wish they didn't have to work away from their husband and children. Yet materialism has them in it's grip.

My wife has started another blog, about being a homemaker. It's our hope that if you are carrying that desire this will help push you over the edge. You can find it at homemaker-by-choice.blogspot.com.