It really seemed like no big deal to her. There might have been some discomfort, but I've seen cats in pain (ten kids and a cat, you do the math), and what I saw on that day looked nothing like a cat in pain. Since then I have learned that this seems to be true for most animals. The only creature who seems to consistently experience any significant pain in childbirth is the human.
We find the reason for this difference in Genesis 3, as God deals with Adam and Eve after they have introduced sin into God's perfect creation. We refer to it as "the curse", and rightly so because this is where God "breaks" his creation, subjecting it to futility, pain, corruption and death as a physical picture of the spiritual reality that just took place.
Hang with me here, because this is the part that most people don't get: As such pictures, each of the curses that is put on creation, and on humans in particular, also serve us as blessings. It is God reaching out to us in our fallen state, saying "Look around you. This is what sin is like. Now come back to me". For example the curse for the man was strenuous work, pointing to the labor under the law to please God, with the sabbath as a day of rest to point to the new covenant of Grace ushered in by the death and resurrection of Christ.
A few months ago, when I found out my lovely wife was pregnant with our first child, among the many thoughts that entered my mind were these words from Genesis 3:16:
To the woman He said,"I will greatly multiply Your pain in childbirth, In pain you will bring forth children; (...)"To a woman there is really no other blessing in life that comes close to the experience of becoming mothers. Why did God attach a curse of pain to it? Certainly it was not out of malice. What is the spiritual reality that God wants to show us by drawing a picture of the greatest blessing in a womans life resulting from excruciating, unbearable pain?
We find the answer in Romans 8:18-23, where God explains it all to us:
For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.
For the anxious longing of the creation waits eagerly for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of Him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself also will be set free from its slavery to corruption into the freedom of the glory of the children of God.
For we know that the whole creation groans and suffers the pains of childbirth together until now. And not only this, but also we ourselves, having the first fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our body.So from these verses we can derive a list of at least three things that God is teaching us through greatly multiplying the womans pain in childbirth:
- That the world after the curse is a place of excruciating pain and suffering.
- That this suffering is not in vain. It is the pains of a birth process that will result in a new creation.
- When all things have been restored to their right order, and the pain is over, we will look back at it like every mother looks back at her birth with her newborn baby in her arms saying even if it was ten thousand times worse it still would have been worth it.
Posts
Thank you for posting this. I loved it.
ReplyDelete- Molly
It's true....research even shows that mother's that deliver drug-free...bond with the baby far better than mother's that accept pain meds. I can't speak for the pain-med mother as I've delivered all my children at home without anything. It's the most powerful experience I've had and at the end of labor with my first, I'll admit, I was asking God to just get me through it alive. :) The emotions and bonding that first hour after birth are like none other. We're about to deliver our 4th (yup, you guessed it...another home birth is planned) and I look forward to those first moments of life together with our new blessing!!
ReplyDeleteI'd encourage your wife to do all the research she can on natural birth...and to prepare mentally (as she would physically if she were planning to run a marathon) for the task ahead if she is planning on going drug-free. It's important to be as prepared as possible :) Best wishes on your blessing from God!
Thank you for your encouragement, ladies. Especially you, Kat, for your advice. The Lord has been so gracious to bring several women like yourself into our life, who have given birth to their children naturally, and I know Amber loves to learn from them. I have to admit I thought she was a little crazy at first to want to do a home birth, without pain medication, but the number of other women who have experienced it and wouldn't want to give birth any other way is very reassuring to me.
ReplyDeleteMy question is though, since you brought it up, how do you prepare mentally for something like that?
Happy to help!! I LOVE when women choose natural childbirth. I'm 28 and was 23 when we delivered our first. I went from using a regular doc (and considering a c-section just because I'd had surgery before) to choosing a midwife and home birth by the time I was 4 months pregnant. We never looked back! One thing I really like about home birth is that you give yourself no other option....you've made a choice and must stick to it (unless something goes wrong which RARELY happens) I felt for me...that was comforting and I didn't have docs or nurses offering me epidurals when things got tough. I knew how I wanted to have my baby and I was going to do it just that way. I know for a lot of women, they "want" a natural birth but allow the pain and stress of labor to get to them, thus giving in to medication (especially when in a hospital setting) Women have given birth naturally for centuries and I reminded myself that if millions of women could do that, I most certainly could too! :p
ReplyDeleteI would suggest your wife do as much research on natural childbirth as possible! Watch youtube videos of it, get a sense for what it's really going to be like. Don't go into it thinking that it won't be hard or won't be painful. I assure you, it will be the most painful thing she's ever experienced...and yet, the most wonderful and powerful. That's how God designed it.
Talk to other women who have had a home birth and find out what they would have changed about it (if anything) and what they liked about it. Look at your options for positions to birth in, water birth, etc. Become a part of a natural birthing class and learn exactly how your body responds to contractions and what is happening when a contraction hits.
There is so much information out there! One of my favorite books is "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth." Another good book to look into would be "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" As amazing and wonderful as breastfeeding is....it comes with difficulty to some (I was in pain the first 6 weeks nursing my first but we stuck to it and nursed over a year...would have longer but I became pregnant with the next one and my milk dried up)
I don't know if you've chosen a midwife but choosing a good Christian midwife is key. It's such an intimate experience (birth) that I felt it was really important to have a deep connection with my midwife, deeper as in knowing we were on the same page Spiritually. Sure helps if you have a midwife that can and will pray with you when it gets tough. (mine happens to be a mother of 9 :)
I'd be more than happy to email (email at batgirlandrobin(dot)com and I'll email back from my private address) with your wife and encourage her. It sounds like you guys have a GREAT start and wonderful perspective on birth....won't be too much longer before you're holding your precious gift!
I also wanted to say, Good for you in supporting her! A lot of men don't come along side so easily or supportively. My husband embraced the idea of home birth immediately and honestly wouldn't consider a hospital birth unless there was a true need. It's just wonderful to see men that support their wives during pregnancy and labor...your wife is blessed :)
ReplyDeleteEasy for you to say. You're male, and for you the only pain of childbirth is the emotional discomfort of seeing your wife in pain. If you were a woman writing this, I'd still be skeptical, but since you'll never experience, saying that the pain of childbirth is a blessing is not only meaningless, but it also comes across as flippant. Sure, it might be a powerful experience, but you can't say that until you've done it.
ReplyDeleteAh yes. Nothing better than a man lecturing on the pain of childbirth.
ReplyDeleteMy mother had c-sections (complications and all that) for all her children and she still loves us more than anything.
ReplyDeleteNow excuse me, I have to go tell her she did it wrong and that she must not love us as much as she should.
@Sarah, if you try reading the post before you comment, you don't have to make a fool out of yourself the next time.
ReplyDelete